Disclaimer: ain't gettin' payed. don't own em'. Archivers; It's all yours! (I don't know what catagory this would go under. Maybe humor) WARNING: Extremely wierd. Read with caution. Authors note: Race and Benton are brothers. That makes Jonny and Jessie cousins. Hillbilly Quest By: Lauren Kirk "The Hun" Dedicated to Jael Jonny woke up to the sound of a rooster crowing outside his window. "What in the Sam hill!!!! I slept in! Pa's gonna be madder than a castrated bull if he finds out that I forgot to milk Miss Besy.". Jonny threw on some of his overalls and ran downstairs and shot out the front door like a Jack rabbit with a dog on it's tail. When Jonny got to the barn and slid open the large doors he saw Jessie squatted down milking one of the cows. Jessie turned to look at The half dressed boy standing in the door. "Well it's 'bout time you got up! Don't just stand there with the door open! Were ya' raised in a barn?!?" Jessie asked. "You know I wasn't born in no barn, Jess! Your just flurtin', arent ya'?" Jonny asked. Jonny walked over to to Mis Besy and started to milk her. " Yur lookin' purty taday. It's your hair, aint it?". "Yup! Pa said I had ta waorsh it this week," Jessie answered. "Where is ol' Race?" Jessie got up from the floor and picked up the bucket of milk and walked toward Jonny. "I think he went ta town to get some supplies for our weddin'. I can't wait! Just think! I'll be Mrs. Jessie Quest!" "Yup, I can't wait to! I wonder how many of our relatives will come?" Jonny asked. "Well cuzin' Hadj hasn't been on speekin' turms with both Race and Pa ever since they got married." Jonny said while rubbing his chin. "Last time I talked with cuzin' Hadj, he said it was kinda' strange that us two get married considerin were cuzins." "Well, there diffurnt over there in Indiana. Sumthin' about marri'n _out side_ of the family." Jonny explained to Jess. "They sure got sum fuuuuny customs in Indiana! Lets go inside the house and see what Benton is doin'," Jessie said while taking Jonny's hand. When the two teenagers went inside the house they saw Benton bent over, pants half way down his crack, working on the TV. "Need any help, Pa?" Jonny asked. Benton turned to look at the couple standing in the doorway holding hands. "Aint that cute! You two are holdin' hands!" "Aaaww Pa! Now I'm blushin'! Need any help with the TV?" Jonny asked. "I didn't make it all the way through the sixth grade fer nuthin'! I cun do it," Benton said. Benton took a few steps back from the TV and slammed his fist on the side of the TV. The screen went from static to a fuzy picture. "Told ya kids I could do it!" Just then a car pulled up to the house. All three of them went outside to see who it was. "Hey! It's Race!" Jonny yelled. Race got out of a beat-up old pickup and smiled at all three of them. (Author's Note: That last Hi there was directed towards Benton.) "Hi Jonny! Hi Jessie! Hi there darlin'!" Race said. "Did ya' talk ta Julia? Is her husband and her comin' to the weddin'?" Benton asked. "I talked with her all right," Race said. "She and her husband 'Old Man Surd' can't come to the weddin'. She said they had to pick up an icecream truck that they bought. They are gonna go get it the same day of the weddin'. Did anyone RSVP?" "Yup! Mr. Zin and his two daughters are comin'. And Rage said he couldn't come. Sumthin' 'bout he was being a councilar at a bible study group that day. And that is about it!" Benton said. THE END Sooooo what do you guys/girls think? Lauren Kirk "The Hun" (c) Lauren Kirk 1997